QUESTION:
Help! I love orange soda. Its delicious pep and explosion of caffeine make for the perfect pick-me-up in a horrendously boring corporate office environment. I try not to have it more than once a week, but when I do, I worry that people may be judging me. It is, after all, slightly juvenile to be drinking fluorescent orange soda pop... do I give up the guilty pleasure?
ANSWER:
Dear Spray Tan,
Look, just because something's orange doesn't mean it's bad. Just ask Snooki and all her friends on "Jersey Shore." They're ADORABLE!
I'm a firm believer in Doing What You Want To Do As Long As You Ain't Hurtin' Nobody. If you really believe your co-workers are judging you based on your weekly beverage of choice, well, wow. I feel sorry for them. You could be drinking Nyquil mixed with crushed Celexa, and who are they to judge? This is AMERICA, DAMMIT.
If you insist on being a self-conscious ninny about it, there's an easy fix. Pour your soda in a black coffee mug and no one will ever know the difference.
Drink Up,
Fancy Advice Blog
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