Some people asked us some questions so here are some answers. IT'S FANCY

Friday, April 2, 2010

Pubic Option

I'm in my 40s and my boyfriend is in his 30s. We haven't been seeing each other all that long, but he's asked me if I wouldn't mind getting rid of my pubes. I don't have any real objection to it, but is he pushing the hairy envelope by telling me what to do with my body?

ANSWER:

Dear Old Growth Forest,

Your Southern Yeti is yours to do with as you please. Why not ask him to bleach his trouser pelt blond and braid it into cornrows because you can only reach orgasm if you pretend his wiener is a scarecrow? You're both adults and someone your age shouldn't be putting up with these selfish demands, unless you stand on the delicate precipice of infertility in which case DO WHATEVER IS NECESSARY TO BRING THE CHILD TO TERM.

After clearing your mound like a napalmed Vietnamese jungle what if he asks you to go in for botox, lipo, rogaine? Don't give ground to this youngster- if you feel sexy the way you are then that's just as important if not more than what turns him on.

Actually, what if he's asking you to do it because you're really gross down there... you should probably just do it.

Slash and burn,
Fancy Advice Blog

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